


I've Always Wanted To Do This

by ListlessDevil



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: A soulmate AU no one asked for, Angst, Doctor Sakusa Kiyoomi, How Do I Tag, M/M, Miya Atsumu is sick, Multiple soulmate identification marks, No Beta, bokuaka and kagehina makes an appearance, osasuna are soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 05:15:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28683162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ListlessDevil/pseuds/ListlessDevil
Summary: Atsumu cupped Kiyoomi's cheek and Kiyoomi just nuzzles into the cold palm."Tsumu.""Come closer."And Kiyoomi did."I've always wanted to do this."And a pair of cold, chapped lips landed on Kiyoomi's own and he just closes his eyes, his tears dropping onto Atsumu's face.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 7
Kudos: 117





	I've Always Wanted To Do This

**Author's Note:**

> This is not accurate. I just wrote it the way I think it happens with the aid of Google. I'm dead.

Kiyoomi groaned as he woke up to his alarm, telling him to get up on an ungodly time of 4 am. Stretching for a bit, he got off his bed and went straight to the kitchen, putting coffee on his coffee machine and getting bread from his fridge and buttered it up before putting it in the toaster. After making preparations for breakfast, he went back to his room to prepare his clothes. He then went into the bathroom, ridding himself off of the pajamas, folding them before throwing them into the hamper. Stepping into the shower, he shuddered when he felt the cold water raining down on him, instantly sobering him up. He quickly finished cleaning himself, eager to get out from the freezing water. 

He dried himself and went out of the bathroom, eyeing the clothes that he was about to wear. He doesn't care if he looks like the grim reaper on his black long sleeves and black pants because it's his first day in the hospital and he doesn't need people getting the impression that he was sociable. Fully dressed, he exited his room to eat his breakfast, the hot coffee burning his tongue, the bitter taste giving him enough life to start the day. He enjoys his buttered toasts in hopes that he can still have this regular meal after starting his job.

After getting ready, he got inside his car and drove to the direction of the hospital at 5:30 in the morning. When he arrived, he saw few people inside, making him sigh in relief and went towards the receptionist, who just blushes when he neared and stuttered when she asked for his business. When he mentioned that he was the new doctor, she immediately phoned someone and told him to wait for a bit, someone's gonna pick him up.

While waiting, he observed the interior for a bit and was pleased to find that it was clean enough to pass his standards. His observation was cut short when he heard footsteps heading his way and saw an elderly man which he recognizes as the chief in charge of the Cancer Department. He bowed his head and started to introduce himself.

"Sakusa Kiyoomi, age 24, interned at Itachiyama hospital. Thank you for accepting me."

The elder just laughed and told him to stand straight, it was too early for formalities. He nodded and followed the chief when he started to walk, leading him to the elevator.

"I have assigned you to a patient about your age. He has Adult Acute Myeloid Leukemia. The doctor assigned to him was transferred to another hospital so you coming in was perfect. His condition is kind of in the worst stage but I trust that you can handle it." The chief informed. 

Kiyoomi doesn't normally get nervous but now he was feeling it. What if his patient was disgusting and annoying? He prayed to the gods to not make him suffer at his first day.

He nodded along to whatever the elder was saying, taking mental notes as they neared a room.

The chief knocked for a bit and smiled at Kiyoomi when he received a "Come in." He slowly opened the door and nudged Kiyoomi to come in. Entering the room, the first thing that caught Kiyoomi's eyes was faded blond hair. They then drifted to the owner's face and Kiyoomi almost stopped breathing.

_Fuck, he's gorgeous._

His hooded eyes stared back at him, looking at him curiously. Kiyoomi doesn't know if that was supposed to be hot or cute. Maybe both. His chapped lips were near to purple, an occasional red strip indicating that it bled. His skin was pale, making it obvious that he was sickly. His eyes traveled lower and he studied the boy's composition. He was thin but has muscles, a sign that he was an athlete or something near that guess.

"Doctor? Who's this?" He heard the boy speak. And _does he have an accent?_? His eyes went back to look at the patient's face properly when he saw something floating above his head. 

What.

"Oh, this is Dr. Sakusa Kiyoomi. Starting today, he will be assigned to you." The chief introduced, passing Kiyoomi the blond guy's stats.

Name: Miya Atsumu  
Age: 25  
Birthday: October 5, 1995  
Weight: xx kg  
Height: xxx cm

"Nice to meet'cha, Omi!"

He looked up from the papers and gave the blond, which was now Atsumu, a glare.

"Don't call me that." He spat, not enjoying the smirk that guy was giving him.

If this wasn't a patient, Kiyoomi might have been arrested for use of violence. He was then again distracted by the numbers flashing above Atsumu's head.

"Hey Omi-kun. What are those numbers doing on top of yer head?" 

Kiyoomi then hurriedly looked up only to find nothing. There was nothing. Noticing the exchange between the youngsters, the chief understood what was happening and cleared his throat, getting the attention of the two.

"I may not see it but the look in your faces say that you have found your soulmate."

There it is. Kiyoomi lived long enough to not find his soulmate and he honestly thought that he wasn't going to meet them. But fate apparently has plans for him, giving him a gorgeous yet sickly soulmate. He felt his stomach turn queesy when he noticed how small those numbers are. 

Don't tell me-

"So does that mean that those numbers indicate how much time is left?" Atsumu asked, exhaustion dripping on his voice. 

"Maybe. And I think that you should go to sleep now. You look tired." Kiyoomi told him, a yawn from Atsumu following his words.

"Mmn. By the way soulmate..."

"What?"

"Let's promise each other to never tell what we see, okay?" Atsumu smiled, his eyes near to closing.

"Sure. Now go to sleep, Miya." Kiyoomi sighed, his mind a mess, struggling to make sense of the current information.

When he made sure that Atsumu was asleep, he went out to get himself more coffee, introducing himself to every staff that he encounters. The number of times he said his name was forgotten, his mind still in a mush regarding what happened earlier. 

Great.

He finally found his soulmate. And he's not even sure how long he'll live despite the numbers giving him an accurate countdown. 

Just try to not get too close.

"Miya, I just told you to fucking shut up and rest."

Now, Kiyoomi knows that he's not supposed to cuss in front of his patient but his _patience_ is so close to zero.

"Eh?? But Omi-omi, yer moles are really lookin cute! If ya just smiled a bit, I'll fall for ya. Not that I haven't yet." Atsumu teased, laughing when he got a reaction from Kiyoomi. 

"Well, unfortunately, you won't see it." Kiyoomi retorted.

Atsumu just rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out, but followed Kiyoomi's instruction anyways. He closed his eyes, his eyebrows scrunching when he felt his bones aching. He whimpered when he tried to lay down on his side, his muscles protesting at the pain. Sweat dripped down his back despite the air conditioner and he immediately felt relief when his pain was numbed. He opened his eyes to see Kiyoomi adjusting his liquids, pumping pain killers into his blood stream. And he just admires the way those black curls hung, framing his handsome face. He was so tempted to kiss those two moles on his forehead for funsies. His mind kept on relishing the other's beauty when he slowly drifted to sleep. 

Kiyoomi released a breath he didn't know he kept when he saw Atsumu's pained expression. Watching him looking peaceful relieved Kiyoomi to a degree he knows doesn't exist. He just looked so... Peaceful. And Kiyoomi is curious. Only a little bit curious about Atsumu.

Work continued as usual, months later and he was getting the hang of it. His irregular hours though made him unable to have a proper meal, only eating in front of Atsumu to convince the blond to also eat. 

"Is that... Is that umeboshi? Omi, ya eat that?" Atsumu asked, his chopsticks hanging from his mouth.

Kiyoomi looked up from his lunch tray that he bought from the cafeteria, still chewing the said umeboshi. He stared at Atsumu's face, his skin gaining color from eating. 

He looked at the umeboshi sitting on top of his rice and then back at Atsumu's face.

"You want to try?" Kiyoomi asked and the way Atsumu's face lit up almost made him trip despite him sitting down.

He picked one up with his chopsticks and delivered it to Atsumu's waiting mouth. He watched as Atsumu began to chew it with an unexplainable expression on his face. He let out a laugh when Atsumu scrunched his face, the sourness getting to him.

"Omi-kun." Atsumu suddenly said.

"Mmn."

"Didja... Didja just laugh?" 

Kiyoomi then straightened up and made his face neutral. He shot Atsumu a look before saying, "It was just your imagination."

Atsumu then shook his head, an offended look on his face.

"It surely wasn't! I didn't know ya can laugh Omi-omi." 

Clearing his throat, Kiyoomi shifted his stare to his lunch tray and continued eating.

"Well, you don't know me Miya."

"Then tell me."

Kiyoomi tried to ignore Atsumu's intense stare. He looked up and met Atsumu's eyes and he can see the blond's curiosity in them. He sighed and put away the now empty lunch tray and faced Atsumu properly.

"There's nothing much to know about me."

"Then tell me about yer family."

"I don't have any siblings but I have a cousin. His name is Komori Motoya and he's now a professional volleyball player. He's a libero. Since I've been branded as a germaphobe, I really don't have any close friends. But I still keep in contact with Hinata and Bokuto. They're also both professional volleyball players." Kiyoomi said.

"Hmm. Since ya have friends as volleyball players, do ya also play volleyball Omi?" Atsumu guessed, a hint of familiarity on his eyes.

"Mmn", Kiyoomi hummed. "I used to be one of the top spikers in the country. But I injured my wrist so I couldn't continue playing."

He observed Atsumu's face, and he can see longing.

"I used to play too, ya know. I'mma setter!" Atsumu giggled, lifting his arms to mimic a set. He then stopped and laid his head on the window, watching the bustling city below.

Kiyoomi hummed again, a sign that he was listening and that prompted Atsumu to continue. 

"I was diagnosed with AML just when I was about to finish my third year in highschool. People typically only survive about 4-6 months after diagnosis, and if yer lucky, you'll end up living more than 5 years. It ended my volleyball career. Symptoms showed up on my second year but because I exercised regularly, it held the cancer back for a bit. At least that's what they say." Atsumu looked back at Kiyoomi, wondering if the doctor was bored of him already but there was Kiyoomi, making himself comfortable as he can be on a cushioned chair, not a single trace of boredom on his face. He chuckled a bit, earning a questioning look from Kiyoomi. He just shook his head and continued.

"I didn't stay here 24/7, ya know. I went to university, just stayed at the hospital for a week every month for my treatment. And the doctors thought that I was getting better. _I_ thought that I was getting better. Until two years ago, my body ached a lot like the time before I got diagnosed. They said that I broke out a high fever and I was sweating like crazy, and I was like, "What's new?". All I could smell was iron because of my nosebleeds and even though I haven't played volleyball for almost a month, I had bruises." Atsumu let out a small smile. "I miss playing. Yeah, they let me out on good days if I could walk but that's that."

Listening to Atsumu, Kiyoomi refused to look at the numbers. His eyes once again travelled on Atsumu's frail body and he refused to acknowledge the way he felt his heart drop.

Don't get too close.

.

.

.

Kiyoomi rubbed his tired eyes, his coffee not doing anything to satiate his sleepiness. He yawned as he opened the door to Atsumu's room and wasn't surprised to see that he was asleep, phone still on his hand. He sighed and took the phone from him, settling it on the table beside the bed. He then heard a light groan and he sees Atsumu sitting up.

"Omi?"

"Go back to sleep, Miya." Kiyoomi whispered, his voice soft as to not startle the still sleepy blond.

"But it's yer day off starting tomorrow. I'll miss ya." Atsumu pouted, his eyes not meeting Kiyoomi's.

Kiyoomi just nodded, making Atsumu slump almost immediately.

"I wish I can spend yer weekend off with ya. But then, I'll be intruding. So enjoy Omi-omi!" Atsumu laughed, his eyes closed and Kiyoomi felt himself go weak at that sound.

"Uhmm, you can come with me. It's not like you can't walk right? And you can stay at my house if you get tired." Kiyoomi offered before he realized what nonsense he was spouting. He was about to take it back when he saw Atsumu's lip quiver and a happy smile broke out.

"Okay! Omi-omi, thanks!" Atsumu grinned and Kiyoomi was a little bit glad when he asked.

He bid Atsumu good night and went out to find the head of the department, asking for permission. The chief just gave him a skeptical look before thinking for a bit and a hundred speeches went through Kiyoomi's mind just to convince the elder, not wanting to disappoint Atsumu. As he was screaming in his head, the chief just laughed at Kiyoomi's awkward smile and nodded in approval, saying that the boy needed the sun and exercise. He thanked him before he went home, the need to sleep making him rush. 

Kiyoomi swallowed when he saw his patient in front of him. Ignoring his sickly complexion, he looked stunning with his hair combed to the side, wearing a plain dark gray shirt tucked on his black skinny jeans. He had his phone in hand and was sitting on the bed, waiting for Kiyoomi to arrive. He cleared his throat to announce his presence and the bored look that Atsumu was sporting suddenly turned into an energetic smile.

Kiyoomi swears that smile will be the death of him.

"Mornin Omi-kun! Where are ya takin me today?" Atsumu asked as he stood up and joined Kiyoomi by his side, both of them walking towards the exit, heading to the parking lot. 

"You'll see." Kiyoomi responded as he started the car when they were both seated. He looked at Atsumu, who was surprisingly sitting still, and not bouncing at his seat. Maybe he was tired from walking? It's not impossible because Atsumu only walks short distances within the hospital.

Atsumu may have noticed his concerned look because he waved his hands and told Kiyoomi that he was fine, just reserving his energy. He just nodded and drove to the mall and he swears he saw Atsumu's eyes sparkle. 

When they arrived, Kiyoomi parked his car and the two entered the mall together. Seeing that there were a lot of people inside, Kiyoomi adjusted his mask, conscious of the crowd. He was about to ask Atsumu where he wants to go when he felt a soft tug on his sleeve. He raised a perfect eyebrow at him when Atsumu released his sleeve.

"Hey Omi-kun. Is this a date? Are ya takin me on a date?" 

He thought for a bit.

Is this a date?

"I don't know, Miya. Do you want it to be?" Kiyoomi shrugged, as if the thought of this being a date wasn't making his heart do a flip. 

"Kinda. I've always wanted to do this." Atsumu whispered but Kiyoomi still heard it.

"Do what?"

"Goin on a date with ya of course! I've never thought that I would find my soulmate so I'm really happy that yer with me right now!" Atsumu grinned, his smile infecting Omi to do the same.

"Shut up, Miya."

"And Omi..."

"What?"

"Can I hold yer hand?"

Kiyoomi bit his lip and he saw the way Atsumu's face fell. He looked away before coughing, catching Atsumu's attention and thrusted a bottle of alcohol to the blond. Atsumu blinked at him, a confused look on his face before it slowly sunk to him that Kiyoomi was actually giving him permission. He took the bottle and sanitized his hands before taking the hand that Kiyoomi was offering. 

"Now, where do you wanna go?"

They stopped at several shops, trying clothes on and buying them if it fits. Kiyoomi doesn't really shop that much so he felt tired after roaming around with another person. He checked his watch and it was around lunch time. His eyes skimmed over some shops until he saw a restaurant and it actually looks decent so he turned to Atsumu. He turned stiff when he saw the other panting lightly, sweat obvious on his pale face. Now that he noticed, his hand was quite cold and he started to think that this was bad.

"Miya? Exhausted? We can rest there while we eat lunch. Then let's go to my place so that you can sleep, yeah?" Kiyoomi suggested and Atsumu just nodded, holding Kiyoomi's hand tighter. He clung to him, trying to steady his breath and Kiyoomi was thankful that the restaurant was near.

When he went in, a waitress immediately showed them a table and he sat Atsumu there. He took the offered menu and he saw onigiris with different toppings and some meals. He nudged Atsumu, showing him the menu. The blond stared at it unfocused for a while before he scrunched his eyebrows and rubbed his eyes.

"Miya? What's wrong?" Kiyoomi asked, worried that maybe Miya feels uncomfortable again.

"Nothing, I'm just tired." Atsumu answered with a fake smile on, "I hope the bastard isn't here."

Kiyoomi was confused when Atsumu whispered the last part and was about to ignore it when he heard "Oh am I the bastard that yer talkin about?".

Kiyoomi looked up and saw Atsumu? What?  
Wait no. This guy had black hair and looked healthier, wearing an apron with the restaurant's logo. But he looks just like Atsumu.

"What are ya doin here? Aren't ya supposed to be in the hospital? And who's this guy?" The waiter that looked a lot like Atsumu asked.

"Shut up Samu." Atsumu muttered, hands covering his face. He looked worn out.

"Shit, are ya okay? What are ya even doin here anyway? Didja sneak out to have a date? Fuck, I'm calling yer doctor. It's the new number they sent me, right? Fuck, wait a bit. Don't die on me." This waiter dude panicked, and before Kiyoomi had the time to register what was happening, his phone began to ring. He picked it up and Atsumu just facepalmed.

"Hello?"

"Hello? What is my brother doin out of the hospital? He's here right in front of me!" The waiter exclaimed and Kiyoomi just distanced his phone from his ear and stared at the caller.

"Yes, I know. He's with me." Kiyoomi answered and he's gotta admit, the look on the waiter's- is it Atsumu's brother now?- face was kind of amusing.

"Samu, yer embarrasing me here. I'm fine, just tired." Atsumu grumbled.

Samu (?) looked at his phone before looking at Kiyoomi and at his phone again. When he ended the call, same happened to Kiyoomi and Samu just groaned before facepalming.

"Yer the new doctor? Is it okay for Tsumu to go out?" He asked.

"Yeah. And you are?"

"Oh, sorry. Miya Osamu. I'm this dumbass's younger twin and I own this place. Back to business, I'll talk to you guys after I get yer orders. Tsumu, I got it so I'll just give ya that and how about ya, doc?" 

Osamu got his pen and paper out and Kiyoomi just ordered an onigiri set with umeboshi as toppings. When Osamu left, he saw Atsumu leaning on the table, his eyes closed. Kiyoomi was about to tell him that the table is dirty when he saw one of the waitresses clean the table in front of him and he felt pleased to see how proper it was done. 

"Hey, you okay? Was this too much for you?" Kiyoomi asks instead.

Atsumu lifts his head up and gave Kiyoomi a lazy grin then shook his head. He then began to talk about the randomest things and Kiyoomi just nods, sometimes responding to him. Fifteen minutes later, food was placed in front of them and they thanked the waitress, who just blushed when Atsumu smiled at her. Kiyoomi felt his eyebrow twitch when she tried to ask for his number. This guy looks exactly like her boss so why is she hitting on him instead? When Atsumu said no, Kiyoomi felt a sadistic satisfaction after seeing the girl's disappointed face.

After they washed their hands, they started to dig in at the appetizing meal. When Kiyoomi tasted his onigiri, he can't stop eating until he finished his first one. He was about to ask Atsumu why his brother is such a good cook when he saw a sight that made him forget his words. 

Closing his eyes, Atsumu was happily munching on a huge onigiri, his cheeks puffing out. Kiyoomi didn't know what came into his head when he took a picture. But there it was captured on his screen, and Kiyoomi had the urge to pinch his cheeks. Atsumu noticed him and swallowed his food before whining.

"Omi-kun, no fair! If you have a picture of me, I should have one of you too!" 

Kiyoomi felt heat rise to his face, and was about to say no when he heard a shutter.

Too late.

Atsumu immediately hid his phone in case Kiyoomi was going to steal it from him. However, Kiyoomi just sighed and continued eating, prompting Atsumu to do the same, except while teasing Kiyoomi non-stop. When they finished eating, Osamu joins them at their table, sitting next to Atsumu.

"So... Why is my brother out in a date with his doctor?" Osamu asked.

"Samu, this is Sakusa Kiyoomi. The new doctor in charge of me and my soulmate." Atsumu introduced and Kiyoomi almost blushes.

"Oh? What's yer soulmate mark?"

Atsumu fell into silence and Kiyoomi was once again reminded of the time ticking above the blond's head. Atsumu then showed a mischievous smile and made eye contact with Kiyoomi.

"It's my and Omi-kun's little secret."

Osamu rolled his eyes at his twin and turned to Kiyoomi. He lowered his head at him and said, 

"Thank you for taking care of him."

Kiyoomi just nodded and Atsumu stared at his brother's bowing head, a fond look on his eyes. They catched up for a bit and Kiyoomi just snickers whenever Osamu tells him about Atsumu's embarrassing moments. Their conversation had to stop when Osamu was called by his employee and he had to bid them goodbye. Kiyoomi and Atsumu also bid their farewells and went home.

When they arrived at Kiyoomi's place, the raven then gave the blond his medicines and watched as Atsumu ingested them with a disgusted face. Knowing that the blond was tired and the medicines were making him drowsy, he let Atsumu use his bed, the latter immediately giving in to sleep. Kiyoomi was about to leave the room when he felt a cold hand hold his, muttering the words "Don't leave". 

Sighing, he sat on the bed and laid down next to Atsumu, who hugs him almost immediately.

"I've always wanted to do this." Atsumu mumbled and Kiyoomi just closes his eyes, pretending that he didn't hear anything.

When he woke up, he didn't find Atsumu beside him. Judging by the noises, he must be in the kitchen. He went out of the room and into the kitchen only to see Atsumu cooking something. Maybe because of the domestic sight of Atsumu wearing an apron but Kiyoomi felt himself go soft. It gave him the illusion that everything was okay, everything was normal, until the floating numbers that was decreasing snapped him back to reality. 

"What are you doing, Miya?" Kiyoomi asked after Atsumu turned off the stove. He eyed his counter and sink and was pleased to find that there was no clutter. 

"Omi! I cooked dinner, though I don't know if ya will like it..." Atsumu said as he placed the food on the table. It was the standard Japanese meal, with fried tuna and some soup on the side.

Joining Atsumu at the table, he observed his condition and if the cooling sticker on his forehead (Kiyoomi doesn't know how Atsumu found it) was any indication of his current health, Kiyoomi was thankful that it was just a fever. When Kiyoomi tried the food, he honestly wasn't sure if he should be shocked that Atsumu can cook, seeing that his brother owned a restaurant. They ate dinner in silence, mostly due to Atsumu enjoying the big serve of tuna that he prepared for himself.

_Hmm, so he likes tuna._

After feeding him his medicine, Kiyoomi shooed Atsumu to take a shower while he'll be washing the dishes. When he finished cleaning them, he went in his room and prepared some pajamas for Atsumu to wear. He laid down on his bed, looking at his emails on his phone, thankful that nothing urgent happened in the hospital. He heard the bathroom door open and saw Atsumu coming out with only a towel wrapped around his waist. He lost some weight but his abs was still visible and his thighs still look good. 

Fuck, he can't move his eyes away from those thighs. Thankfully, Atsumu didn't notice and just wore the clothes that were on the end of the bed. Kiyoomi just managed to stop a nosebleed from coming out when he saw his black shirt hanging on Atsumu's thin frame, the hem just barely covering his ass. The shorts clung to his thighs and Kiyoomi almost forgets that this was a sick person. Atsumu just yawned tiredly and flopped on the bed, lying down beside Kiyoomi. Seeing his peaceful figure, Kiyoomi covered him with a blanket before he took his turn in the shower. After washing himself, he joined the blond on his bed and the latter cuddles with him, Kiyoomi letting him have his way. 

Kiyoomi woke up the next morning with a back pressed on his chest. It was raining heavily, the sky still dark despite his alarm clock telling him that it was 6 AM. A tuff of hair was tickling his chin so he looked down and all Kiyoomi can see was blond hair and long eyelashes. He watched as those eyelashes flutter slowly, a sign that Atsumu was waking up. His suspicions were confirmed when he heard a light groan, Atsumu turning to face him.

Those hazel brown eyes looked up at him and Atsumu flashed him a small smile.

Yep, that smile was going to be the death of him.

"Mornin' Omi-omi." Atsumu whispered, his voice dripping with sleep.

"Morning. Breakfast?"

Atsumu just nodded his head and they both stood up, heading to the kitchen. They both ate their cereals in peace and if Kiyoomi ever thought that he wants this everyday, he didn't say anything. 

After they went through Kiyoomi's morning rituals, Kiyoomi asked Atsumu what he wanted to do. 

That's how they ended up curled in the sheets, the rain acting like a soft background music as the start of the movie that Atsumu chose began to play.

Kiyoomi doesn't know what to make off of the title, like what does "I Want To Eat Your Pancreas" even mean? He gets his answer soon enough.

When the credits rolled up, Kiyoomi was half-expecting Atsumu to cry because he, too, was getting teary. Instead, Atsumu just snuggled into his chest before asking.

"Hey Omi-kun."

"Hmm."

"If eating pancreas was going to heal her pancreas, do I need to eat bone marrows and drink blood?"

Kiyoomi doesn't know if Atsumu was joking or not. Probably both.

"I don't know, Miya."

Atsumu then looked up and Kiyoomi looked down to meet his eyes.

"Call me Atsumu."

"Atsumu."

Atsumu then lets out a big grin, his ears becoming red.

"Yes, Omi-kun?" 

Kiyoomi just laughs and shook his head. When they both focused on the screen, there was a short clip after the credits.

He felt Atsumu tense up when he saw the graves and Kiyoomi can only hug him tighter to ease hime up. Kiyoomi was about to turn the laptop off seeing that Atsumu was becoming tired when he felt Atsumu poke him.

"What is it, Tsumu?"

"Can we take a picture?" 

Kiyoomi gave Atsumu a look and gave in when the latter began to give him puppy eyes. Happy that Kiyoomi agreed, he took out his phone and took a selfie, with him and Kiyoomi posing with their hands as claws. They took more with filters and Kiyoomi may or may not have smiled in those pictures.

.

.

.

Kiyoomi went back to work and Atsumu went back to his bed at the hospital. Nothing really changed between the two except that both of their phone lockscreens are pictures of each other and their homscreens are their selfies together. Some nights when Atsumu can't sleep, he asks Kiyoomi to keep him company and they end up talking about their school life and moments when they were still playing volleyball.

One afternoon, Atsumu woke up from his nap when he heard a scuffle outside.

"Bokuto, Hinata, I swear to gods don't make a scene- no- you can't go in there- Bokuto stop- fuck Hinata quiet down. Okay okay shut up."

"Omi?" Atsumu thinks.

Right when he thought of that name, the devil appeared with a murderous look on his eyes and Atsumu doesn't need to see behind that mask to know that the raven was scowling.

"Omi?" 

"Tsumu, you're awake. Sorry, were they too loud?" Kiyoomi apologized when two heads popped out.

"Ooh, who's this?" Bokuto asked when he walked in, Hinata following him. Kiyoomi just sighed, then closed the door.

Atsumu swears that he recognizes them.

"Wait, Myaa-sam?" Bokuto asked and Atsumu was genuinely confused if this guy knew him.

"Wait, Myaa-sam has black hair. Shit, Tsum-tsum??" Bokuto exclaimed.

"Atsumu-san? Is that you?" Hinata asked and Atsumu squinted his eyes, trying to remember him.

_Wait._

"Shouyo? Bokkun?" Atsumu guessed, his eyes already watering.

Kiyoomi just looked at them.

_They know each other?_

The two then rushed to hug Atsumu and Kiyoomi was a weak man after seeing those tears. When they let go of him, they immediately sat in front of the blond, eager to catch up.

"Sakkun! Why didn't you tell us that your patient was Tsum-tsum?" Bokuto pouted.

"I didn't know that you guys were friends." Kiyoomi huffed, crossing his arms.

"Bokkun, ya still in contact with Samu?" 

"Yeah! Akaashi loves to buy onigiris there. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"I missed you, Atsumu-san. I thought that you forgot me. You disappeared from volleyball after highschool. They said that you didn't play when you were at university. Only sometimes." Hinata chirped.

Kiyoomi rolled his eyes because honestly, these two are still like birds compared to a jackal. 

"Yeah, sorry. I almost didn't recognize ya? Yer tan is wicked!" Atsumu said.

The three of them kept on talking and Kiyoomi can't help the smile on his face. Not after seeing Atsumu being happy with his friends. He exited the room reminding them to keep their voices down before he visited the other patients. When he went back from his rounds, he saw Hinata outside the room as if he was waiting for him. When he saw him, he lightly waved at Kiyoomi and whispered in a low voice. 

"Can Atsumu-san not exercise or play volleyball anyone?"

"He can but he gets tired easily, especially since he hasn't exercised for a while." Kiyoomi answered.

He watched as Hinata thought for a bit before he whispered something to Kiyoomi. Kiyoomi narrows his eyes but still considers the idea.

"I'll try." 

And Hinata just grinned at him before going back inside. 

The athletes stayed for a bit longer until it was dark outside and they needed to go home since they have practice tomorrow, saying they just stopped by to check on Kiyoomi since they were in the area. They bid each other goodbye and Kiyoomi can see the tired but happy look on Atsumu's face. He let Atsumu take a nap before dinner. 

As they ate, Atsumu whined to Kiyoomi about how stupid he was to not recognize the two when Kiyoomi told him from the start that they were friends. As the blond kept on rambling, Kiyoomi continued to think about how to approach this idea to Atsumu, even if he already got the chief to agree. 

"What's with the deep thoughts, Omi-omi?" Atsumu asked. 

"Yeah uhm. Do you want to take walks with me starting tomorrow? Just in the recreational area. The chief said that you need it." 

Atsumu lit up and Kiyoomi doesn't regret begging the chief for permission only for the elder to laugh at him. 

"Sure!"

Kiyoomi smiled at him, Atsumu mirroring the action.

After he increased Atsumu's medicine dosage, he saw the blond's eyelids starting to get heavy. He reached for his hair, gently combing it with his fingers, Atsumu humming at the feeling. Not too long after, Atsumu started to doze off and Kiyoomi just watched over him until it was time to check on the other patients.

Morning came and Kiyoomi was high from coffee. Bringing an iced black coffee, he entered Atsumu's room, the other already awake, just scrolling something in his phone. Hearing the door open, Atsumu turned his head at Kiyoomi's direction and gave him a sleepy smile.

"Mornin' Omi-omi."

"Morning Atsumu." Kiyoomi greeted back and stood near the door as Atsumu got up from his bed. Kiyoomi then helped him remove some of the needles stuck on his arm. They walked together to the cafeteria to eat breakfast. Kiyoomi tries to ignores the murmurs around him but Atsumu chose not to.

"This must be a new sight for 'em, right Omi?" Atsumu teased, munching on his whole grain bread.

Kiyoomi rolled his eyes but didn't deny it. Kiyoomi rarely ate in the cafeteria and if he did, he'd glare at anyone who tries to eat with him. He usually eats with Atsumu so he didn't find need to eat at this place.

Like always, Atsumu filled their meal with talks, pulling out a smile from Kiyoomi, a rare sight for the people staring at them. After they finished, he brought Atsumu to the recreational park where you can see some patients trying to find peace there. 

Atsumu hummed something that Kiyoomi heard from the radio and Kiyoomi just enjoyed the breeze grazing them as they walked. Atsumu wanted to try jogging but Kiyoomi didn't agree, afraid that Atsumu's body which hasn't exercised for almost two years will be shocked. They just continued walking, Atsumu filling in the silence. Kiyoomi just can't help but stare at the sun-kissed face of the blond next to him. Without him noticing, he slipped his hand into Atsumu's and the other's shocked reaction made him realize what he just did. He tried to maintain his neutral face but the flush in his cheeks gave him away. Atsumu just smiled at him and continued talking. 

They did this everyday for a week, Atsumu getting accustomed to exercising again, even jogging for a bit. When Kiyoomi told him that they're going somewhere tomorrow, Atsumu was honestly confused. Wearing sweat pants and a sweat shirt under his hoodie, Kiyoomi thinks that it is illegal for Atsumu to still look good wearing those. Acting as Atsumu's guardian and doctor, he accompanied him to a nearby court. He brought a wheelchair with him, along with several medicines in case Atsumu gets an episode. 

When they arrived, Atsumu had an inkling on what they were about to do after seeing Bokuto and Hinata waiting for them. When they entered, he saw two more familiar faces and he had to wrack his brain to remember their names. A guy with glasses waved at him and removed his frames, revealing a really beautiful face and Atsumu was sure he was prettier than Oikawa (they kept in contact after Oikawa accidentally tripped in front of him when they saw each other in the hospital). A name was starting to form when Bokuto shouted,

"AKAASHHIII!!!"

Ah yes, the famous Akaashi Keiji that Bokuto won't shut up about even at their texts. He turned his attention to the other guy, observing his facial features in case it rings a bell. The black-haired man must have noticed his staring because he walked towards Atsumu and bowed.

"Nice to meet you again, Atsumu-san."

Seeing the goody two shoes appearance, he snorted when he did remember.

"Tobio-kun, nice to meetcha again too." 

He just nodded and went to Hinata's direction who kept on screaming, "Kagayama!! Tosses! Give me tosses!".

Atsumu rolled his eyes and turned to Kiyoomi who was already staring at him. Kiyoomi then rounded them up, explaining to them that they'll play the maximum of two rounds, which was good enough for Atsumu. Seeing that the rest of them were already in their jerseys, he turned to Kiyoomi who just dragged him into a changing room. He lent Atsumu a new pair of shorts and looked away when Atsumu was changing. 

Kiyoomi is trying. He's doing his best. But why does he keep failing to not stare at Atsumu's thighs? He flexed his wrist, making sure that it was okay for him to play, distracting himself from his soulmate. They all warmed up a bit and separated into two teams. 

Standing on the same court with Kiyoomi was Atsumu and Hinata. Hinata just kept on making faces at Kageyama until they started the game. Kiyoomi honestly thought that it was unfair for two V League players to stand on the same court together against a doctor and a patient. He just shrugged because he can't be that bad and just dribbled the ball before throwing it up into the air, jumping after it and spiked it. Kageyama, with his reflexes as a professional athlete, immediately dug Kiyoomi's serve, only for the ball to swerve after he received it.

 _Yep, he still got it._

After his service ace, he spiked the ball again but this time, Akaashi managed to let the ball up, sending to Kageyama's direction, the latter setting it to Bokuto who just spikes it hard through Hinata's and Atsumu's block. With the other side earning the turn to serve, Kageyama looks ready to kill someone as he performed a jump serve. Hinata shouted that it was his and received the ball, letting it up before moving out of the way, Atsumu replacing his position and set the ball to Kiyoomi's direction, making him spike it, the ball spinning on Akaashi's arms before going out.

Kiyoomi turned to Atsumu, who just gave him the biggest smile yet, and to his hand because _fuck that set was perfect_.

"Omi-omi, yer wrists are sick!!" Atsumu marveled and Kiyoomi can't help but to smile at the compliment.

The game continued and for a doctor who just kept on studying for the last few years and for a patient who was just lying down on the bed for almost two years, their game could almost be considered worthy of being a national tournament.

Kiyoomi discovers a new side of Atsumu. He doesn't like losing. And he just pushed himself into the limits that they won the second set, a fitting comeback after their loss earlier. He hears a chuckle from Atsumu after Bokuto whined that "You guys are too good for people who didn't play for years!!!". He wasn't wrong. Atsumu's hybrid jump floater serves and jump serves were something that Kiyoomi was blessed enough to see. 

He called Atsumu to rest and the other complied, sitting down on a chair while Kiyoomi stuck Salonpas on him on parts where it ached. He wiped down Atsumu's sweat and let him wore his hoodie when felt him shivering. After they all have rested, they should be eating lunch together but Kiyoomi apologized that they couldn't join because Atsumu have pushed himself too far. He didn't bother getting the wheelchair out and just carried Atsumu instead all the way to his car. Atsumu's situation wasn't that worrying, it was just his usual symptoms and fatigue, but it was better safe than sorry, especially when Kiyoomi doesn't want to see the time above the blond's head speeding up. When they arrived back at the hospital, Atsumu rested enough that he could walk back on his own, enjoying the 2-minute sunshine on him before they went inside. Atsumu insisted that he will shower instead of having a nurse wipe him down, and Kiyoomi let's him after making sure that he was okay. Well, if you count having multiple bruises and tiny red dots on his skin okay.

After Kiyoomi took a quick shower, he dressed up and went back to Atsumu's room. He checked his vitals and increased the pain killers dosage on him, knowing that his bones and muscles must be hurting a lot.

Atsumu just showed him a pained smile and the quiver on his lips told Kiyoomi that he was trying hard not to whimper. If Kiyoomi wasn't a doctor, he would have panicked by now, trying to ease the other's pain. But he was and he knows the proper procedures for his patient to feel comfort. He stayed by Atsumu's side, holding his hand. A few minutes later, he felt the hand squeeze his weakly. He turned to look at Atsumu who was just smiling softly at him. He beckoned Kiyoomi to come close, making Kiyoomi lean in closer to him. He felt Atsumu's soft fingers brush his bangs away before leaning in. He froze until he heard a soft whisper.

"I've always wanted to do this."

And he felt two consecutive kisses on his forehead. It was just a light peck, but Kiyoomi feels like the world just stopped. Atsumu then pulled away but cupped Kiyoomi's cheeks.

He was smiling at Kiyoomi and he just smiled back. He kept on smiling before he sniffed and tears were rolling down his cheeks.

"Aww Omi-kun. Why are ya crying?"

Kiyoomi just shook his head and held the hand that was on his cheek.

"Nothing. Why are you staring at me?"

"It's just", Atsumu thumbed Kiyoomi's cheek before lightly brushing on his moles, then back to his cheeks, "I wanted to memorize yer face. I want this beautiful face to be the last thing that I'll see." 

Kiyoomi couldn't stop the tears and he removed Atsumu's hand from his face and held it with both of his hands instead.

"Don't- don't say it like that, Tsumu. Like you're gonna die." Kiyoomi sobbed. 

"I won't. I mean, not yet at least. But ya can see it, right? I honestly still feel okay but I don't know how long my body will last. I just wanted to tell ya that", 

Atsumu kissed the hands that were holding his.

"Thank you for letting me play volleyball one last time. Omi-kun, I don't regret having ya as my soulmate, in fact, I'm happy that yer mine. But what I do regret is, only knowing ya recently and how I hope that I could spend more time with ya." Atsumu smiled sadly at Kiyoomi and held the doctor to his chest when he started to cry loudly. 

Atsumu didn't know that Kiyoomi could be like this but again, he still doesn't know Kiyoomi that much. 

Kiyoomi then calmed himself down, ashamed to even call himself a doctor when he was bawling in front of his patient, but Atsumu said that it was okay. Kiyoomi just nodded and excused himself, heading to the cafeteria to grab their dinner. When he entered the room again, he saw Atsumu smiling at his phone. He asked what made him so happy and Atsumu just showed him pictures that they took earlier when they were playing. Akaashi was a good photographer. They both pretended that nothing happened earlier and carried on with their meals.

.

.

.

Kiyoomi wants to pull his hair off. He wished he didn't see it. He wishes he can't see it. But he can, and that made his life miserable. 

Atsumu was doing fine. He looks fine. He talks fine. He can even walk fine. But the numbers above him were not fine.

He tries to act normal in front of Atsumu but when the other sleeps, he stays up studying, looking for ways so that he can just stop the motherfucking cancer from getting worse. He didn't notice that he fell asleep until he heard his phone buzz at 3 AM and saw that it was Atsumu messaging him. 

_Mornin' Omi-kun ( ╹▽╹ )  
I couldn't sleep because my body hurts... Jk! It was because I missed ya!_

And selfies of him were sent together with the text. Kiyoomi then washes up and drove back to the hospital even if it wasn't time for his shift yet. He didn't even bother to stop by to buy coffee, just walking at a fast pace to Atsumu's room. When he opened the door, Atsumu's shocked expression greeted him.

"Omi? What're ya doing here?" Atsumu asked.

"You said that you couldn't sleep so I'm here." 

Atsumu slowly registered Kiyoomi's words before moving to the side of his bed, tapping the now free space for Kiyoomi to lie on. Kiyoomi took his offer. He laid down beside Atsumu, to which the latter slowly hugs him. Kiyoomi can't stop his breath from hitching, not from the way Atsumu's skin was freezing. He ignores it anyway and held Atsumu tight, afraid to let go.

He's not fine.

Kiyoomi pretends he doesn't notice. Pretends that he doesn't know why Atsumu had no appetite to eat. Kiyoomi only managed to fed him when he offered that he'll feed him. Pretends he doesn't notice that he was zoning out when Bokuto and Hinata were talking to him when they visited. Pretends that his heart didn't ache when Atsumu can't fill in the silence because he was too tired to talk. Pretends he doesn't notice the way Atsumu's muscles thinning out, losing more weight. 

But he can't keep on pretending. 

Subconsciously, Kiyoomi was the one filling the silence between them, talking about how Hinata and Bokuto won against his cousin, how he should eat more, suggesting colors that may have suited the blond. If Atsumu noticed it, he didn't say anything.

On times when Kiyoomi wasn't there at Atsumu's side, he plays the radio because Atsumu doesn't like too much silence. He enters the room and he catches Atsumu humming to Eve's 'As You Like It', tapping his finger to the beat. 

Atsumu's eyelids were heavy from eyebags. His sleeping schedule was messed up, he sleeps in the afternoons and wakes up in the middle of the night because everything is aching. Kiyoomi distracts him from his pain by singing songs, not caring about his stoic image, just for the sake of making Atsumu smile through the pain. Literally.

It was a good day. Atsumu could talk fine, and he could even make jokes, which made Kiyoomi feel relieved. If it wasn't for his occasional wince and his heavy eyebags, any normal person would think that he's fine. Kiyoomi even responded to Atsumu's flirting, shocking Atsumu.

"Omi-kun! I never knew that ya were such a flirt!" Atsumu gasped. "But I like this side of ya."

Kiyoomi just rolled his eyes and the two continued their banter as if Atsumu wasn't on death's door the past week. But fine wasn't enough because Atsumu still became tired. Kiyoomi let him take a nap.

After he made sure that Atsumu was snoozing, he called Osamu to inform him about Atsumu's recent behaviors. He didn't have the heart to tell him to prepare himself. Seems like he didn't need to because Osamu said that he'll be bringing someone for mental support.

Now that he was without the cap and uniform, Osamu looked hot in casual clothes. He looked too much like Atsumu. Well, which was dumb considering that they were twins. But Atsumu, despite sickly, there was something about him that gives off an arrogant and confident vibe, maybe his smug face gave it away. Osamu, however, looked like the type of person that doesn't give a fuck about anything except food and sleep. Maybe his brother. And the person behind him. Who was literally plastered on Osamu's back, his tired eyes boring on Kiyoomi's face as he discussed Atsumu's condition. Osamu nodded, his face still indifferent. If Kiyoomi didn't notice Suna, the guy behind Osamu, whispering at Osamu's ear before placing a kiss on his neck, his eyes wouldn't have wondered to Osamu's clenched fist, which Suna was trying relax. It worked.

When Kiyoomi opened the room, Atsumu was still asleep. Kiyoomi half-expected Osamu to smack his brother awake because that's what twins like them usually do. Kiyoomi doesn't know. And Osamu doesn't. Instead, Suna does it. But _gently_.

Atsumu let out a groan, his eyebrows scrunching in annoyance. They relaxed when Kiyoomi ran his fingers on his hair. Kiyoomi watched as the blond's long lashes started to flutter against his skin, ignoring the digits that seemed too close for his liking, and too small for his liking. When his eyes were open, Atsumu blinked once.

"Omi?"

He heard a cough. Atsumu then blinked twice.

"Samu? Sunarin? Whatcha doin here?"

Suna rolled his eyes.

"Hello to you too, Tsumu. We'll give you some space to talk." Suna said as he exited the room, Kiyoomi following behind him.

As Suna sat down on the metal chairs outside the room, Kiyoomi sat down, right next to the chair beside Suna. He eyes him, his beautiful face now familiar.

_Fuck? Isn't this Motoya's teammate?_

He looked away and started to open his phone, Atsumu's face greeting him. He heard a hum right next to him and he sees Suna looking at his way.

Suna then eyes him, his gaze studying Kiyoomi as if he was a weasel under a fox's stare.

Kiyoomi raised his eyebrow when Suna still haven't said anything yet. A minute later, he was about to stand up and excuse himself when he finally spoke up.

"You're Tsumu's new doctor?"

Kiyoomi then relaxes when Suna finally sat properly, his focus shifted to the wall infront of them.

He hummed in response.

"You're pretty young. Maybe younger than him." Suna continued.

"Yeah, I'm younger than him. How long has he been here?"

Kiyoomi knows. He just wanted to talk himself out from his nervousness.

"He's been here ever since we graduated high school."

"Oh? How did you know that he had leukemia?"

"We didn't, until he fainted at our last game at the nationals. Samu said that he frequently had fevers on our second year, and he always had bruises but we all thought that it was because of volleyball. His sweat was excessive so Kita-san used to let him cool off a bit, thinking that he was just practicing too hard. "

"Yeah, those are the starting symptoms"

"Yeah... It wasn't noticable but he was getting thin and he randomly got nosebleeds. He even kept quiet about that fact that his bones were aching."

Kiyoomi heard a light quiver in Suna's voice and he turned to look at the other's face which was still had the same droopy eyes, if Kiyoomi wasn't paying attention, he would've missed the tears pooling on the others eyes.

"And right after we lost our last game, he collapsed and started to shiver like crazy and we all panicked. When we arrived at the hospital, the doctor said that he had leukemia. And that was the first time I saw Osamu sob like crazy."

Kiyoomi can only imagine.

The guy looked like he wasn't interested in anything and his conversation with Atsumu was full of snarky comments. To be able to break down like what Suna said, he must've been heart broken.

Kiyoomi and Suna sat there in silence, the twin's bickering on the background.

A few minutes later, Kiyoomi heard a panicked sob and he immediately stood up, his hand about to open the door when he heard a shushing whisper. He turned to look at Suna, not knowing if he should go in or not. He received a head shake, a simple way of saying no. Nodding, he went back to his seat and leaned back on the chair, the cold metal making him shudder.

"So you're Suna Rintarou, right? Can you tell me more about Atsumu?" Sakusa asked, curiosity eating him out and the need to block the hushed conversation made him break the silence.

Suna turned to him then copied his position, his back pressing on the cold chair. 

"Is this your question as a doctor?"

Sakusa closed his eyes, and thought for a bit before shaking his head.

"I'm asking this as his soulmate."

He swore he heard Suna's neck crack at how fast he turned his head to look at Kiyoomi.

"You're... You're his soulmate?" 

Kiyoomi hummed in response, his eyes searching for a hint of pity on Suna's face, only to find none. The older's lip curled up, it was barely called a smile but Kiyoomi can tell that it was one.

"He's lucky to have you."

And Kiyoomi never thought that hearing such acknowledgement felt so good.

"Hmm... I guess I can tell you a few things." Suna mumbled, lifting his legs so that he can lay his cheek on his knees.

"I met the twins in highschool. Me and Osamu were classmates and I met Atsumu at our volleyball club. I was always caught up in their shenanigans and I have been trying to avoid their dumb antics."

Kiyoomi observed Suna's expression, his face still beautiful despite the frown starting to form. He watched as Suna tried to recall what happened and the frown started to become a smirk and Kiyoomi dreaded whatever he'll be hearing next.

"They always fought and I used to record their petty arguments. Until one day, one of their petty fights involved who had a better body between the two of them even though they were almost the same.

"They asked me to be the judge and turned their backs to me. I then noticed the stupidly accurate birthmark that was in the shape of a fox on Samu's lower back. I had the exact same one and I showed it to them. Samu and I were pretty chill about it, especially since we made out about three times before but I will never forget how Atsumu was stunned and hugged me, telling me to take care of his baby brother." Suna showed a light smile. "And for the first time, I cried in front of him. Maybe it was because of his blessing that I felt soft. Don't tell Atsumu I felt like that."

Kiyoomi just nodded, now understanding on why Suna was close to the twins, especially Osamu. They were soulmates.

"I was by their side when they bickered about Osamu's weird obsession with food and Atsumu's horrible choice of hair dye. He was so cocky, fully confident on his volleyball skills and we can't even deny it because he put in a lot of effort to get those skills. How happy he was when he was scouted by All Japan's training camp and when Osamu prepared an onigiri lunch box for him for his trip."

Suna's small smile disappeared and a sad look washed over his face.

"Osamu was worried about him because he had a bad fever before he left but chances like that were hard to come by so he went anyway. When he went back, he looked so pale and a tissue was lodged into his nose, still red from his nosebleed. But he looked happy and we ignored the way his body shivered.

"When we lost against Karasuno on our second year, the ones who cried the most were the twins. Maybe it was a way to console each other but Osamu cooked a lot of Tuna for Atsumu and Atsumu cooked a lot of rice for Osamu. And Atsumu became the captain. Things were going well until they had a huge fight when Osamu said that he wasn't going pro in volleyball. Maybe it was because Atsumu was aware of his condition that he calmed down right after they shouted each other, excusing himself. He had another nosebleed and another fever broke out. On our last game when we lost, he flopped down on the ground, like what he does when he gets exhausted and we told him to stand up, thinking that he was about to fall asleep on the floor. When Osamu shook him, he was sweating like crazy, not the normal type when you finish playing a sport. And bruises were now apparent on his body, not just on his arms and knees. He didn't wake up no matter how hard Osamu shook him awake so I dialled an ambulance. We were expecting news like he just overworked himself or something but the doctor asked Osamu if we had any relatives that had cancer and he said that his grandpa had leukemia. The doctor showed us Atsumu's test results and what do you know, leukemia."

Tears were streaming down Suna's face and Kiyoomi doesn't know what to do so he just kept his mouth shut and listened. That was the right thing to do since Suna wiped those tears and continued speaking, as if he didn't just cry.

"Atsumu just laughed it off, saying that he was fine and that we'll just watch him get better soon. Osamu shouted at him, telling him that this was serious and no more volleyball for him. I was expecting Atsumu to shout back like he usually does but he just covered his face, and we knew that he was crying when told us that he knows, so stop reminding him. And Osamu broke down in front of him, ugly crying and hugged Atsumu. Maybe I cried when that happened but seeing Atsumu now, there was no way I'm in position to cry."

Kiyoomi didn't notice that he was tearing up until a cold drop fell down his cheek. Atsumu always seemed happy, with his smirking face and usual teasing. But Kiyoomi knew that he was hurting, the way he winced when he was talking to him or when he shivered whenever he can't reach the blankets. On good days, he told Kiyoomi that he wants to take a walk but he seemed so unstable that he says no. Atsumu usually just pouts but lays back down on his bed and starts humming songs that he hears on the radio.

"I can see it." Kiyoomi starts to say.

Suna turned to him, confused.

"See what?"

"How much his time is left. That's how I knew that we were soulmates. Atsumu can see mine too but we swore to never tell each other."

Suna bit his lips that were quivering and he asked the question that Kiyoomi expected.

"How much?"

He whispered the numbers, soft enough that only Suna can hear it.

And Suna let out a silent sob, his hand wiping tears after tears as he processed the information.

Kiyoomi gave him a napkin and Suna gave him a silent thank you, cleaning up the eyeliner that was ruined by his waterworks. They stayed silent for a while until the door opened, Osamu telling them that it was now okay to get inside.

He and Suna stood up and went inside to see Atsumu stuffing his mouth with Tuna and Onigiri. He looked like a chipmunk. Kiyoomi tells him exactly that. Suna just snorted as Atsumu whined, saying that he was so mean. He gave him a bottled water and wiped off the stray rice grains that ended up on his cheeks.

Kiyoomi then proceeded to check on his patient's vitals, adjusting his IV drops and searched for bruises that may have appeared on the older. He just listened as he heard Suna making fun of him, as if he didn't just cry a while ago, and telling him stories that happened when he wasn't around.

His eyes wandered to the blond's face. He looked exhausted but the crinkle on his eyes told him that he longed to join his twin and Suna on whatever adventures that they had, even a simple story about a trip to the grocery store made his eyes lit up. And Kiyoomi felt his heart swell and drop everytime he sees Atsumu. If he can just ignore the floating numbers on the boy's head, maybe he can look at him without feeling depressed.

Osamu insisted that he'll stay the night. Atsumu shooed him and told him to come back tomorrow if he was that excited to see his face again. Osamu just snorted, saying "Ya wish". Atsumu waved them goodbye but was taken by surprise when Osamu hugged him and kissed his cheek. Suna looked away, his tears threatening to spill out. 

"Don't die, Tsumu. Please. Ya can't. I cant-" Osamu sobbed and Atsumu just pulls him closer, shushing him while caressing his back. 

"Samu. Please. Samu. Don't do this to me please." Atsumu begged. He looked at Osamu in the eyes.

" _Please._ "

Osamu sniffed and pulled back, nodding his head. He stood up and gave Kiyoomi a look before they exited, Suna giving Atsumu a rushed hug before following them out. 

"How long?" 

Kiyoomi turned to Osamu.

"What?"

"How long? How much time does he have left?" Osamu repeats, his voice quivering.

Kiyoomi just looks away and Osamu just nodded. 

"I'll come back tomorrow. Please. Just _please_ take care of him."

Kiyoomi just nods, a lump on his throat making him unable to say anything.

After seeing them out, he returned to Atsumu's room. He heard heavy breathing so he rushed and saw that Atsumu was breathing slowly, a pause, then breathing again. He fiddled with the liquids and pumped high dosages into Atsumu. And the heavy breathing quieted down. But he was still breathing slowly. _Too slowly._

Atsumu gave him a small smile before dozing off. Kiyoomi couldn't just pretend that he couldn't see the skin being close to blue, so he held Atsumu's hands, not bothering that it was ice cold. Kiyoomi wasn't a religious person but he chanted a prayer to almost all the gods that he knew, and maybe it worked because Atsumu woke up a few minutes later. His lips were so dry that Kiyoomi couldn't believe that he just ate a ton of tuna and onigiri earlier. 

He placed the straw on Atsumu's mouth, and the blond just sipped on it until 3/4 of the glass was gone. He sighed in satisfaction before blinking slowly. He turned to Kiyoomi in confusion.

"What time is it?"

"It's almost seven pm, Tsumu. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Was it my imagination that Osamu visited yesterday."

Kiyoomi bit his lip and held back a whimper.

"They left over an hour ago."

Atsumu just formed an 'o' with his mouth before turning to Kiyoomi.

"Omi. Don't be sad. Don't cry please. Fuck, yer messing up yer pretty face. Yer pretty anyways. Shh, Omiii." 

Kiyoomi didn't even notice that he was crying. He didn't even notice that his vision blurred the numbers above Atsumu's head.

"I love you." Kiyoomi whispered.

Atsumu's hand that was cupping Kiyoomi's face froze. Kiyoomi took it and kissed his palm.

"I love you so much. I've always wanted to say that."

Atsumu looked down, and Kiyoomi held his hand tighter when he started to shake.

"Yer unfair. All of ya are unfair." Atsumu sniffed. Kiyoomi lifted his chin up and Atsumu's face was all scrunched up, and it was Kiyoomi's turn to cup his cheeks.

"I love ya too Omi. So much. So fucking much. Omi", Atsumu sobbed and stared at Kiyoomi through tear-covered eyes.

"I'm scared."

And Kiyoomi just held Atsumu's head against his. They stared at each other and Kiyoomi moved in to kiss those tear-stained eyes. Atsumu then hugged Kiyoomi's neck, moving his lips to Kiyoomi's temple. He placed wet-kisses on Kiyoomi's moles, and Kiyoomi trembled in his touch.

When Atsumu passed out from exhaustion, a nurse came in and he listed a shit ton of prescription to be added. He knows they won't do much but...

Kiyoomi would do anything to just extend even one more second,

Fucking one more second,

With Atsumu.

When the chief came in to check, he didn't comment on why Kiyoomi was laying down, sleeping next to Miya Atsumu, and just sighed. Despite with years of experience, he still can't get used to this scene.

Osamu came back like he promised. Suna wasn't with him. He knees went weak when he saw more machines and liquids connected to his brother.

Kiyoomi gave them time alone.

Atsumu joked that he shouldn't have come because he looks like shit. Osamu says that he always looks like shit. He spends the whole morning with Atsumu, not bothering to come out for lunch until Kiyoomi convinced him to eat, Atsumu was asleep anyway. Osamu looked back at his brother's peaceful figure, _too_ peaceful, before he took Kiyoomi's suggestion and headed for the cafeteria.

When Osamu came back, Kiyoomi was checking Atsumu's vitals and saw how the man looked so exhausted. He must've not slept for almost a week, his eyebags complimenting his pale skin. His hair was so unkempt, totally different from the time when Osamu first saw him at his restaurant. When Kiyoomi saw him, he just nodded at him before exiting the room giving the two privacy once more. 

Atsumu failed to recognize Osamu at first glance when he woke up. He asked Osamu who he was, the latter choking back a sob before he managed to let out a painful laugh.

"Ya don't even recognize me? I'm offended."

"This little fucker. Be kind to me. I'm a patient."

And Osamu actually did. He ignored Atsumu saying that he was being creepy. He doesn't care. He mutters all sorts of prayers to the point that he doesn't know who's he praying to but please-

_please, just fucking please... Don't take his brother from him._

He forgot to put a brave face on and just begged Atsumu to not leave him. Atsumu just smiled sadly at him before he started drift in and out of consciousness.

"Tsumu? Tsumu!! Fuck Tsumu answer me! FUCKK!! TSUMUU?!!"

Kiyoomi rushed in and saw Osamu trying to shake Atsumu, the blond trying to stay up, unresponsive to all the noise that Osamu was making. When Osamu saw Kiyoomi, he grabbed his labcoat and kneeled,

"Save my brother. Please."

Kiyoomi doesn't answer him, the glowing red numbers painfully obvious to him. Osamu may have understood his silence and went out by himself when more doctors and nurses came rushing in. Kiyoomi acted fast, trying to stabilize Atsumu, his fingers trembling and he just couldn't look away from those fucking numbers. When the heart monitor showed Atsumu's heart rate falling down, the chief shook his head and the staff stopped, their pitying gazes boring into Kiyoomi as he didn't give up, desperately increasing the dosages.

"Dr. Sakusa."

Kiyoomi doesn't hear him.

"Sakusa."

Still doesn't hear him.

"DR. SAKUSA KIYOOMI."

Kiyoomi turned around and shouted,

"WHAT?"

The chief gave him a sad look before saying,

"He's looking for you."

And Kiyoomi just rushes to Atsumu's side, his hands immediately gripping on Atsumu's cold ones.

"Omi?"

"Tsumu. I'm here Tsumu."

"Omi..."

"Fuck Tsumu, I'm here. I won't lose you. Just please..."

"Omi." Atsumu whispered, a few tears decorating his face. 

He still looked beautiful.

Atsumu cupped Kiyoomi's cheek and Kiyoomi just nuzzles into the cold palm.

"Tsumu."

"Come closer."

And Kiyoomi did.

"I've always wanted to do this."

And a pair of cold, chapped lips landed on Kiyoomi's own and he just closes his eyes, his tears dropping onto Atsumu's face.

When they parted, Kiyoomi whispers against his lips.

"Me too. Tsumu, I've always wanted to do this too. Tsumu-"

A finger shushed Kiyoomi.

"Fuck, if I knew that it would be this early, I would have spent my life trying to find ya instead. I should have eaten more of Samu's onigiris instead. But I- I can't. So Kiyoomi,"

"Mmn."

"Tell Sunarin to take care of Osamu for me. And don't tell me that I should tell him that myself because ya can see it right?"

Kiyoomi stays silent.

"But fuck Omi,"

Kiyoomi looks up.

"I don't want to leave ya."

And Kiyoomi kisses Atsumu ten more times, twenty more times, whispering an 'I love you' everytime. And Atsumu whispers it back.  
Atsumu smiled one last time before mouthing a last 'I love you' to Kiyoomi, and Kiyoomi kisses him again.

The computer beeped loudly, the monitor displaying a straight line.

Kiyoomi still hasn't left Atsumu's cold mouth.

"Sakusa. Please."

He shakily stood up before checking his watch and announced,

"Time of death: 16:05, September 10, 20xx."

And the nurses covered the cold body, and Kiyoomi felt dead. When he went out, he stood beside Osamu as they both watched the person precious to them, being wheeled away. 

Osamu looked at Kiyoomi with watering eyes. He didn't blame Kiyoomi. Instead, he hugged Kiyoomi and Kiyoomi just hugged him back tightly. Both still processing their loss. They let go of each other when they heard a shout.

"SAMU!"

Rushed footsteps followed him and Kiyoomi saw Suna, still in his jersey, running towards them. Behind him were Komori, Bokuto, Hinata, Kageyama, Akaashi, a person with the same color as Bokuto but not spiked, a foreigner, and a person with greyish hair.

Suna stopped running and slowly walked to Osamu before hugging him, sobbing and all the people behind him were also bawling their eyes out. 

"Suna?"

Suna looked up, his face was wet with tears.

"He told me to tell you to take care of Osamu for him."

And Suna's breath hitched before letting out a laugh.

"He knows that I will."

.

.

.

Kiyoomi was sent home that night. He showered and skipped dinner. He laid down on his bed and stared at the two phones on his bedside table.

One was his and the other was Atsumu's.

He gave it to Osamu but the latter just shook his head and told him to keep it. 

He grabbed Atsumu's phone and turned it on. It didn't have a password since he got tired of typing everytime he needs to open it.

He didn't unlock it yet. Just staring at his own face that flushed red. It wasn't the Kiyoomi that he was used to seeing. He swiped it open and he came to face the selfie of him and Atsumu together on his bed, the two of them making claw hands. Kiyoomi's eyes weren't on the camera that time, his eyes shifting to look at Atsumu while the blond had his tongue out. 

He didn't wanna snoop on his soulmate's phone but he got curious when he accidentally touched something and the apps that he recently used were:

1\. Notepad  
2\. Gallery  
3\. Camera

He tapped the icon and he saw a note that Atsumu just wrote recently.

_If Omi-omi sees this, it means that I have ascended to heaven (that or he just snooped on my phone while I was asleep). Okay then..._

_Omi, if yer reading this, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving ya alone. I'm sorry that I wasn't strong enough. I'm sorry that... I didn't stay._

_I'm really shitty with words so I'm just gonna write a fuckton of random babble._

_To be honest, when I first saw ya, I thought, "Who the fuck is this gorgeous guy and what is he doing inside my room?" I almost couldn't believe that ya were my doctor, seeing that ya were so young. I was observing yer beautiful face when I saw those numbers above ya. I was confused. Really. And if I just payed attention, I would have seen ya doing the same. If it wasn't for the chief telling us what it meant, I would have bugged Samu for an explanation that didn't do something with him. When I had an idea what it meant, I was jealous. Jealous of the long life still ahead of ya when mine was like a ticking time bomb._

_Ya came off as snobby as ya can be, like who sprays their patient with alcohol? But I didn't really mind back then, ya just took my interest. Those foul words coming out of yer mouth was something that I didn't expect from someone with yer status. What do ya know, we're all different. Pestering ya became my entertainment! Until, it wasn't entertainment anymore. I always caught myself staring at ya, trying to read ya and I fell in love every time I did. You and yer illegally good looking face. Everytime I discover something new, I feel excited because it was like I was trying to read a code I can't decipher. But I was wrong. So wrong. Ya were actually quite simple to read, with the occasional surprises. And I fell deeper into a hole called Sakusa Kiyoomi._

_I cursed myself for being in love with someone, even if that someone was ny soulmate, because I know that I'll be too scared to let go when it's time. Osamu and Suna are making it hard as it is and ya just had to join the fray. How fun. But I never regretted, Omi. Ya were worth all the pain that I had to go through._

_I love you.  
I love you.  
I love you.  
I love you.  
I love you._

_I love you so fucking much Sakusa Kiyoomi. I wanted to kiss yer lips so fucking bad but it just feels wrong. Painful. Awful. But I wished that I just did it despite the pain._

_When I stayed at yer house, even if it was just one night, I felt at home. I wanted our everyday to be like that. Eating dinner. Lazing around. Watching movies. Cuddling._

_I won't get tired of saying this but,_

_I love you._

And Kiyoomi held the phone close to his chest whispering,

"Me too, Tsumu. I wished for our everyday to be like that too. I love you so much that it hurts. Tsumu..."

A week later, Kiyoomi was dressing up, wearing a black suit that he just bought. He'll never wear it again. He combed his hair then grabbed his wallet and his phone before heading out.

When he arrived, there were only a few people. He saw Hinata and Bokuto, along with the others he saw at the hospital, near a table. That table held the visitor list. He neared them and they all waves at him, even Hinata and Bokuto looked like they just lost life. He just waved back and signed his name before sitting down. Minutes later, he felt a touch on his shoulder and he didn't react strongly after seeing a glimpse of Suna's face.

"Hi."

"Hi. Samu is calling you."

He stood up and followed Suna, who was walking to the direction of Osamu. He was talking to a monk. He payed respects.

As more people entered, Kiyoomi could hear whispers about him.

"Ya know that guy? I've never seen him before." "Fuck, he's hot. If this wasn't a funeral, I'd totally ask for his number." "What if he has a soulmate, dumbass." "Oh please, only a few people meet their soulmates."

He felt someone take a seat next to him. It was Akaashi. They didn't speak to each other, which Kiyoomi appreciates, because his mind is in a mess so he doesn't know if he could actually hold a proper conversation.

"Sakusa, you okay? You look like you just shot a person but don't give a damn."

Kiyoomi laughed at that because that style of humour felt familiar. Maybe twins will be twins. 

"I don't know, Samu. I'm only here for the free coffee."

Osamu rolled his eyes and let out a chuckle.

"Unfortunately doc, ya have a speech to do."

Oh right. He has to make a speech. Everyone who was close to Atsumu was making a speech. Osamu was first and he was second. Funny how he became second when all of these people knew Atsumu longer than he did and they don't even know him.

When they were all seated, the monk did it's thing and everyone was quiet. Except for a few sniffing from strangers that Kiyoomi doesn't know. Even Hinata and Bokuto were quiet. When it was time, Osamu went in front and a mic was fixed.

"Hello and thank ya for everyone who made it. I'm Miya Osamu, Miya Atsumu's twin brother." Osamu started. Then he started to talk about his childhood with Atsumu, his times with Atsumu, and the time when Atsumu was diagnosed. He didn't even sob and that was an accomplishment. 

"Stuck in the hospital for 24/7, Atsumu didn't desire that life. He wanted to continue volleyball but his body won't agree and that made him distant. Even I was struggling on how to communicate to a guy who grew up with me and had my exact face, but suffering. And what do I say to a guy like that?" 

He continues, Suna laughing occasionally when an inside joke was mentioned. After he finished speaking, he stood up and replaces the spot that Osamu just left. He can feel all eyes on him. He pulled his mask down and people immediately became silent.

He cleared his throat.

"Hello, some of you here might not know me but I'm Miya Atsumu's doctor. Sakusa Kiyoomi. When I was assigned to him, I didn't know what to say when I first saw him. But the first thing that came into my mind was 'He's gorgeous'. But then I saw what no one else saw. He saw the same in me. I'm not trying to be sweet or anything because literally, noone else can see them. The numbers floating above our heads that can only seen by each other, yes, we were soulmates. And we made a promise to never tell each other what we saw and I agreed. I told myself to not get too close but this was Miya Atsumu, you can't just not get too close. I only know the past Atsumu from the stories that he shared with me and the sparkles in his eyes when he told me how fun highschool and volleyball were made me fall for him. And I resigned to fate and allowed myself to love him."

At this point, Kiyoomi doesn't know what he's saying. He spoke of the moments that he was fond of, and it was all of them except when Atsumu was in pain. And he stopped himself from saying anymore because he knows that he'll break down. So he cleared his throat once again and said,

"Miya Atsumu. Those months that I spent with you were the months that I will never regret. Rest well and wait for me. I love you."

When he finished, Osamu was the first one to clap and they all followed. After a few more speeches, a bunch of compiled videos were played, courtesy of Suna. When the last video was played, all were silenced, even Kiyoomi.

It was Atsumu on his bed making faces at the camera. Then a light groan was heard and Atsumu stopped making faces and turned the camera. It was Kiyoomi. He was slowly blinking his eyes open. He didn't see the camera, too tired to notice.

"Tsumu?"

Atsumu then showered Kiyoomi's face with pecks before saying,

"Mornin Omi-omi. Did I wake ya up?"

"No. Sleep."

And Kiyoomi moved closer to Atsumu, snuggling into his neck.

Atsumu then hid a giggle behind his hand and moved the camera to show Kiyoomi's arm wrapped around him. He then made a finger heart while featuring Kiyoomi's face before turning off the camera.

People then turned to look at him but he doesn't notice because he's busy trying to remember when that happened.

When Atsumu was being buried, Osamu hugged Suna, covering his face to hide his tears and Suna was trying to keep a neutral face but in the end, he did the same with Osamu. Kiyoomi didn't cry. He just smiled and kissed a single chrysanthemum before placing it on Atsumu's grave. He bid Osamu and the others goodbye before he went home. 

He carried on as usual. But without Atsumu. It was weird. But he was a doctor and Atsumu wouldn't like it when he keeps on moping around. The chief just patted his back and that's that. 

He didn't go anywhere on his day off. It was raining. And he was bored so he watched a movie. When the credits began to roll, he opened his curtains, it wasn't raining anymore. He stared at sky before letting out a small smile.

_You know Atsumu, I've always wanted to do this too. But it would be much better with you here._


End file.
